This is not elementary school, damn it!
Been there, done that, no need to rinse and repeat!
We are evolved beings!
And we will not be treated in a lesser manner!
But is this really true?
Are we really that evolved?
Allow me to tell you a story, then you tell me: are we essentially any more evolved than we were 100,000 years ago?
Adam was raised a nobody in big-branching tree, far out on a limb stretching way off to the right, so far off and out and up that he could touch Heaven, he said. He had to have something to grasp, just like we all do, and that was his shtick. It gave him importance. And over time, from sheer repetition of thought, he began to believe more and more strongly in his importance, such that every whim that skimmed his head was to him a suggestion from God Himself.
From the outside looking in Adam appeared as weak-minded and unsure of himself as the majority of others in the big tree and, having been dismissed as another of the white-washed mainstream, the mainstream itself paid little attention to him. The slightly more with-it mainstreamers couldn’t be bothered with the insignificant, and instead troubled themselves with what they felt were more impressive issues.
At a time when scroll seals, trumpets and bowls were being let loose and locusts were looming thick and black on the horizon, big tree morale, resolve, and independent thinking had all but died out. The more with-its needed to somehow achieve success at the daunting task of finding a leader from amongst their wishy-washy midst, a somebody who could guide their big-branching tree in these times of heightened conflict and cosmic disturbances.
Although Adam felt overqualified for this position, importance-wise, he realized he would not be taken seriously by the others because of his appearance, uncomely and uncertain as it was, and he forgave them for that as was right to do. The big tree populace collectively swore they were aware that appearances were deceiving yet they consistently grasped unbecomingly desperately at anyone that looked good enough to eat and talked smack.
He understood that, for at the core of his importance, he was but one of them. And it was just this inborn foible that he would play on, for the mother of all whims had descended upon him. He would single-handedly find his people a leader. He knew exactly what to look for considering the tribulations of the times and his people’s set-in-stone taste for the sensational.
While the majority of the tree people were all engaged in the hand-flapping, tail-chasing circular dance of Mundanity, he would scour the whole of the big-branching tree to find a candidate with the exact number of sequins and baubles required to register no lower than a 9.7 on the miracle scale.
It took five months of full-time searching but finally Adam hit the jackpot. Her name was Mae West, the double entendre queen, a real buxom beauty, the fastest talking, most bodacious brick wall of a woman he’d ever smacked up against. She had confidence out the wazoo, enough to light up the big-branching tree and all of Heaven like it was Christmas.
Adam started a website and pushed Mae to the hilt. It didn’t take long before the entire right side of the big tree was on board and the MaeForLeader blog site was getting 3000 hits per day. Soon the more with-its and the ones with power to spare were all over Mae. Asked if he thought Mae could do the job, the Top Right Tree Being said, “Do you really need to ask? I mean, just look at her!”
And that was all it took. She was in. Next thing you know they’d pushed her out onto the stage, front and center, stuck a mike in her face and pulled her string, “I don’t like myself, I’m crazy about myself,” she said, but was quick to add, “But you know what? I’m even crazier about you mainstreamers! You betcha!” And the crowd went wild.
Sunlit tree snagged from http://www.snellvilleumc.org/clientimages/31612/adults/oak_tree_1_copy.jpg
Click here for more on prompt “#134 – ‘I don’t like myself, I’m crazy about myself,’ Mae West” from other Sunday Scribblings participants